Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Healing and Prayers Abound...
March 4, 2009.
Aum Namah Shivaya,
I had Darshan this evening and took a picture of my dear friend and brother/sister in Divine Jeff Bader to Amma for blessings. When we stopped in on Bill and Jeff for one night on our way to the Faerie Gathering in Portland, we came to learn that Jeff has been diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's Disease (ALS). I shared with him the power of Amma's sankalpa (resolution) and asked if he would be willing to allow me to take a picture of him to Amma for blessings and sankalpa. He did provide me with a picture of himself that I took to Mother today for blessings. This was only my second Darshan since being here in Amritapuri (just over a week now). A lot of people go up for Darshan 2-3 times a week. I am not feeling that "needy" for Darshan, but there are a few things that I needed to do. I needed to take Jeff to Mother's embrace for sankalpa with this ALS that has invaded his being. Amma took me to Her bossom and gave me a very beautiful Darshan which felt more like it was for Jeff than for me. I tried to become as empty as possible - an empty vessel for the power of Her sankalpa to reach Jeff on a cellular level. My hope and prayer is that it worked. Amma whispered in my ear in Punjabi (she was not told this time that Punjabi is my mother tongue), "My darling son, my darling son, Ma...ma...ma..."
Jeff...I hope that these powerful healing vibration reaches you and that you are open enough to receive the boons of Amma's Grace.
Now, I am off to bed so that I can rise early as tomorrow morning is my Rahu-Ketu Puja in the Kalari at 5am and then at 6pm my Shiva Shakti Puja. I am gearing myself up for these two Pujas tomorrow and want to ensure that I have a good night sleep and am as alert and prayerful as possible to heal and transform my future and the future of some of my biological family as well as other relations.
Aum Namah Shivaya...
Aum Namah Shivaya,
I had Darshan this evening and took a picture of my dear friend and brother/sister in Divine Jeff Bader to Amma for blessings. When we stopped in on Bill and Jeff for one night on our way to the Faerie Gathering in Portland, we came to learn that Jeff has been diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's Disease (ALS). I shared with him the power of Amma's sankalpa (resolution) and asked if he would be willing to allow me to take a picture of him to Amma for blessings and sankalpa. He did provide me with a picture of himself that I took to Mother today for blessings. This was only my second Darshan since being here in Amritapuri (just over a week now). A lot of people go up for Darshan 2-3 times a week. I am not feeling that "needy" for Darshan, but there are a few things that I needed to do. I needed to take Jeff to Mother's embrace for sankalpa with this ALS that has invaded his being. Amma took me to Her bossom and gave me a very beautiful Darshan which felt more like it was for Jeff than for me. I tried to become as empty as possible - an empty vessel for the power of Her sankalpa to reach Jeff on a cellular level. My hope and prayer is that it worked. Amma whispered in my ear in Punjabi (she was not told this time that Punjabi is my mother tongue), "My darling son, my darling son, Ma...ma...ma..."
Jeff...I hope that these powerful healing vibration reaches you and that you are open enough to receive the boons of Amma's Grace.
Now, I am off to bed so that I can rise early as tomorrow morning is my Rahu-Ketu Puja in the Kalari at 5am and then at 6pm my Shiva Shakti Puja. I am gearing myself up for these two Pujas tomorrow and want to ensure that I have a good night sleep and am as alert and prayerful as possible to heal and transform my future and the future of some of my biological family as well as other relations.
Aum Namah Shivaya...
Making Progress...
March 4, 2009.
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah,
Last night's Kali/Karthika Puja was REALLY powerful. I had a front and center seat in the Kalari to witness the Puja and take lots of pictures. I was directly in front of the door to the inner-Kalari which was open and there was a very beautiful Amma doll dressed in a royal purple sari (my favourite colour if some of you didn't know that already). I sat there while Amma was singing bhajans in the main hall as I didn't feel like being in the big hustle and bustle of the main hall crowds after the bhajans. The Puja was to begin at 8pm and usually that's when they start Aarti to Amma so I also didn't want to leave at that point. I could hear Amma singing Her heart out from the Kalari anyhow so it felt like being right there in the hall with Her. The last bhajan that She sang which was very high energy was Jago Ma Kali Jago Jago. This means "Rise Up Mother Kali, Rise Up" That was a very powerful beginning to an amazing puja which included the chanting of Amma's 108 Names followed by the full Archana (1,000 Names of the Divine Mother). There were a few bhajans as well. I was quite high by the end of it and just retreated directly to my room for the night.
I am finally feeling like I am making a bit of progress with my Malayalam classes. I did in fact study and re-wrote all of the alphabet (consonants, double consonants and vowels) as well as a good portion of the words that I have learned so far. I am writing them out in Malayalam and then in Punjabi script (as I know the proper way to pronounce them that way) as well as English transliteration (as best as possible) and their definitions. Slowly but surely this vocabulary will start to sink in the more that I write them out.
I have a Darshan token for today, but quite a late one which is completely fine by me. I have also asked Nath (a westerner who sings with the Western Group) if I could sing one bhajan for Amma sometime. He said that there are a lot of people in their group who wish to sing for Her, but if I come tonight at about 5:30pm or so, they would allow me to sing one bhajan for Amma. What a blessing this is to be able to sing for Her here at the Kali Temple where She is receiving everyone in Her Infinite Loving Embrace! The energy of the Kali Temple is so powerful to begin with let alone adding Amma giving Darshan to the mix. Now the challenge is, which bhajan do I offer Her today? I seem to gravitate toward "Amritanandamayi Jai Jai" but it's a slower bhajan so then I think one of the faster ones like "Amma Baramma" or "Shakti De Bhakti De" or "Jai Ambe Jagadambe". I know that Amma will ultimately make the decision for me as I am pretty good to go on any of these bhajans that are coming to me to offer to Her this evening (if it happens). I say "(if it happens)" because I am all too familiar with the leelas (plays/games) that Amma plays with us when it comes to bhajans and offering Her bhajans. It is a real test in detachment.
I need to go and pick up some clothes that I had made at Amma's Tailor Shop on the other side of the backwaters in Vallikavu before it gets too late.
I shall write more later tonight after my Darshan.
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah.
So...it's 6:25pm here and I am now noticing why it is that Amma has to shower everyone with infinite love and show us Kali every so often. The ego that surrounds Her is overwhelming. Kali's main goal is to slash the ego with Her swords and wear the skulls around Her neck of those whose ego is so strong.
The bhajan leela prevades. I arrived in the Kali Temple at 5:30pm to be told that the time alotted to the "Westerner's Group" was cut and they only have time for 4 bhajans.
I am now back in my room after rushing from the tailor shop on the other side of the backwaters and doing some laundry to get the Temple in time for 5:30pm. I think that I will just sing some bhajans here in my room at my alter to Amma as I know that She will hear them. As She said in Her response to the question in yesterday's Q&A; one who puts the teaching to practise will be remembered by the Master not the one who's always physically close.
I have a Darshan token for "end of day" whatever that means. I don't actually know what time Darshan will go until tonight. It seemed that only the Indians were still in the Darshan line. She hasn't started with the Westerners as yet.
Even if I miss Darshan today due to playing the harmonium and singing my heart out...well, that will be fine too. It's ALL Amma's Grace that I can even be here at Amritapuri and witness all that is going on around me and and be in the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual state that I am in now. It's wonderful to be in Amma's embrace, but I also don't want to be greedy and/or selfish about it.
Tomorrow is a BIG day for me too. I have the Rahu-Ketu Puja at 5am and then the Shiva-Shakti Puja at 6pm. I will also have my Malayalam class at 1pm and studying to do so I don't want to be up too late tonight and miss any of these events. It's important that I be fully alert and present at the Pujas tomorrow so that I will know what is going to be done for me once a year when I send the donation to have these Pujas done on my behalf (as per the vedic astrologer's recommendation).
One moment at a time...
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah,
Last night's Kali/Karthika Puja was REALLY powerful. I had a front and center seat in the Kalari to witness the Puja and take lots of pictures. I was directly in front of the door to the inner-Kalari which was open and there was a very beautiful Amma doll dressed in a royal purple sari (my favourite colour if some of you didn't know that already). I sat there while Amma was singing bhajans in the main hall as I didn't feel like being in the big hustle and bustle of the main hall crowds after the bhajans. The Puja was to begin at 8pm and usually that's when they start Aarti to Amma so I also didn't want to leave at that point. I could hear Amma singing Her heart out from the Kalari anyhow so it felt like being right there in the hall with Her. The last bhajan that She sang which was very high energy was Jago Ma Kali Jago Jago. This means "Rise Up Mother Kali, Rise Up" That was a very powerful beginning to an amazing puja which included the chanting of Amma's 108 Names followed by the full Archana (1,000 Names of the Divine Mother). There were a few bhajans as well. I was quite high by the end of it and just retreated directly to my room for the night.
I am finally feeling like I am making a bit of progress with my Malayalam classes. I did in fact study and re-wrote all of the alphabet (consonants, double consonants and vowels) as well as a good portion of the words that I have learned so far. I am writing them out in Malayalam and then in Punjabi script (as I know the proper way to pronounce them that way) as well as English transliteration (as best as possible) and their definitions. Slowly but surely this vocabulary will start to sink in the more that I write them out.
I have a Darshan token for today, but quite a late one which is completely fine by me. I have also asked Nath (a westerner who sings with the Western Group) if I could sing one bhajan for Amma sometime. He said that there are a lot of people in their group who wish to sing for Her, but if I come tonight at about 5:30pm or so, they would allow me to sing one bhajan for Amma. What a blessing this is to be able to sing for Her here at the Kali Temple where She is receiving everyone in Her Infinite Loving Embrace! The energy of the Kali Temple is so powerful to begin with let alone adding Amma giving Darshan to the mix. Now the challenge is, which bhajan do I offer Her today? I seem to gravitate toward "Amritanandamayi Jai Jai" but it's a slower bhajan so then I think one of the faster ones like "Amma Baramma" or "Shakti De Bhakti De" or "Jai Ambe Jagadambe". I know that Amma will ultimately make the decision for me as I am pretty good to go on any of these bhajans that are coming to me to offer to Her this evening (if it happens). I say "(if it happens)" because I am all too familiar with the leelas (plays/games) that Amma plays with us when it comes to bhajans and offering Her bhajans. It is a real test in detachment.
I need to go and pick up some clothes that I had made at Amma's Tailor Shop on the other side of the backwaters in Vallikavu before it gets too late.
I shall write more later tonight after my Darshan.
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah.
So...it's 6:25pm here and I am now noticing why it is that Amma has to shower everyone with infinite love and show us Kali every so often. The ego that surrounds Her is overwhelming. Kali's main goal is to slash the ego with Her swords and wear the skulls around Her neck of those whose ego is so strong.
The bhajan leela prevades. I arrived in the Kali Temple at 5:30pm to be told that the time alotted to the "Westerner's Group" was cut and they only have time for 4 bhajans.
I am now back in my room after rushing from the tailor shop on the other side of the backwaters and doing some laundry to get the Temple in time for 5:30pm. I think that I will just sing some bhajans here in my room at my alter to Amma as I know that She will hear them. As She said in Her response to the question in yesterday's Q&A; one who puts the teaching to practise will be remembered by the Master not the one who's always physically close.
I have a Darshan token for "end of day" whatever that means. I don't actually know what time Darshan will go until tonight. It seemed that only the Indians were still in the Darshan line. She hasn't started with the Westerners as yet.
Even if I miss Darshan today due to playing the harmonium and singing my heart out...well, that will be fine too. It's ALL Amma's Grace that I can even be here at Amritapuri and witness all that is going on around me and and be in the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual state that I am in now. It's wonderful to be in Amma's embrace, but I also don't want to be greedy and/or selfish about it.
Tomorrow is a BIG day for me too. I have the Rahu-Ketu Puja at 5am and then the Shiva-Shakti Puja at 6pm. I will also have my Malayalam class at 1pm and studying to do so I don't want to be up too late tonight and miss any of these events. It's important that I be fully alert and present at the Pujas tomorrow so that I will know what is going to be done for me once a year when I send the donation to have these Pujas done on my behalf (as per the vedic astrologer's recommendation).
One moment at a time...
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
My New Favourite Day in the Schedule!!!
March 3, 2009
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah...
I don't think I need to constantly state that my day started with the breakfast cashier seva. That's a given now.
I will however say, that I think Tuesdays are my new "favourite" day in the Ashram schedule! The Questions & Answer period with Amma is very special. The questions seem to be a lot more intelligent here at the Ashram compared to the questions that get posed in the West on tour.
Today, I was seated about 5 people away from Amma and it was really beautiful to watch Her. Once She had finished giving the answer in Malayalam and while it was being translated to English, She was playing with the 5 or 6 children that were sitting right in front of Her peetham (platform). She was making little sculptures with playdough and putting playdough bindis on each of the children's foreheads. She started drawing flowers with pencil crayons in an art pad. It was all really beautiful to witness. She became a total child with the children.
The questions that was posed today was:
"How can one engage in God when one works in a job that doesn't allow much focus on God? When will I be able to see God if I am unable to focus on God more often due to my job restrictions?"
Some of the highlights of Amma's (lengthy) response were:
"One who ALWAYS thinks of God becomes the devotee and one who prays to God reaches His abode." This quote was from Lord Krishna from the Bhagavat Gita.
Amma elaborated by saying: "ALL thoughts flow and become prayer so there's no difference between thought and prayer if the thoughts are pure and the intention is to reach God."
"God is not confined to just one thing or form. There is no God sitting up in the heavens on a gold throne. Go beyond ALL forms and become one with the All-Prevading Consciousness which is formless."
"Once you realize that I am not the Karta (doer) and I am not the Bhugta (receiver) then you loose the ego. God is the STRENGTH behind ALL our actions. This realization allows us to transcend the ego."
"One cannot even move a finger without the power of God behind the movement. It is by the grace and power of God that one can close his mouth after yawning. If God's power was not there, then the person's mouth would just remain open."
"We are all just instruments. Everyone is just a form of the Supreme Consciousness. All your actions should become an offering to God. When there is a strong doership (I did it) then the offering becomes a war."
Amma related a story from the Shiva Purana about a monk who performed a Fire Ceremony but took a lot of credit for it and expected to be praised for the wonderful ceremony. This became a war and the beauty of the fire ceremony was lost because the ego leared its ugly head and came in the way of the pureness of one's actions being controlled by God and therefore realizing that the beauty of this fire ceremony was not due to the monk, rather it was due to God's power behind the actions of the monk.
"It's more important to put the teachings to practise rather than always wanting to be physically close to the Master. It is that devotee that will be remembered by the Master." So many of us fight to get the closest seat to Amma or to be able to do the sevas that put us right in Her view, but in fact it's the ones that are out of sight that Amma remembers the most.
"To serve and love people you automatically have God on your "list". God doesn't carry a "list", but by serving others, you serve God and therefore remember God on a constant basis."
"We get merrits (punya) by purchasing things from Amma's shops because the money goes to all of Her charitable causes. It is better to buy things from Her shops because more than just one person benefits from that purchase. The purchaser benefits by getting the thing that he/she wants, and then so many less fortunate ones benefit from the monies raised through the sale of that item."
"Going beyond the "I" is the best way to do seva. Doing seva this way will allow us to reach God."
Amma related a story from Gautum Buddha. A monk visited a woman who did not believe in these spiritual things. The monk put his hand out to her and she spat in it. The monk responded "This is for me. Now what will you offer the world?" This illustrates that the monk had transcended his ego and was only looking to serve humanity with love. He did not get angry at the woman for spitting in his hand, rather he accepted that as an offering to him.
One really cute thing happened just before Amma concluded the Satsang with a bhajan. While the Brahmachari was still translating that last portion of Amma's response to the question, Amma was playing with the children and the playdough. She looked over Her shoulder and noticed a devotee (brahmachari/renunciate) was sitting near Her who had his eyes closed. To anyone of us, he would appear to be in meditation, but Amma knew that he was in fact sleeping and picked up her face cloth and threw it at him with perfect aim. This all happened very quickly. Amma was going to throw something else at him too, but when She turned around for the second time with the other item in Her hands, She noticed that he had awoken and was sorry that he had fallen asleep. He had his hands clasped at his heart and Amma placed the item down and motioned to him to do 10 namaskarams (standing and turning on the spot with hands clasped at heart centre offering prayers to everyone and every direction). He did this and sat back down.
It was quite humourous to watch this interaction with Amma and Her child. She did not even watch him perform these namaskarams. She continued playing with the children in front of Her.
Another story was shared when they were setting up the food lines (as Amma serves everyone lunch on Tuesdays after Satsang). There is a man with some kind of a mental illness here on the Ashram compound. He has a very large belly and his name is Raju. Once when Amma was travelling outside of India, Raju was walking around aimlessly (as he often does) on the Ashram compound and he was saying that his biological mother has no time for him and now even his Amriteshwari Amma did not have time for him either. He was contemplating taking his life as he felt that there was nothing left to live for if his Divine Mother doesn't pay attention to him. In rebellion, he went over the backwaters and went to a restaurant and ate mutton one day.
While Amma was at one of the programs in the West, She specifically asked to see the live feed computer systems which transmit live feed through Amrita TV to India. Amma looked into the camera and started waving and calling for Her Raju - Her Mutton Raju. Amma knows ALL that is happening. She does not need to be physically present in order to know what our actions are.
What a Satsang! I really loved it a lot.
Now I am needing to study my Malayalam before the Kali Puja in the Kalari at 8pm. I need to be there on time to get a good seat as I am to take pictures of the puja. This Kali Puja is for purification.
I shall write more a little later after more experiences are had.
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah...
I don't think I need to constantly state that my day started with the breakfast cashier seva. That's a given now.
I will however say, that I think Tuesdays are my new "favourite" day in the Ashram schedule! The Questions & Answer period with Amma is very special. The questions seem to be a lot more intelligent here at the Ashram compared to the questions that get posed in the West on tour.
Today, I was seated about 5 people away from Amma and it was really beautiful to watch Her. Once She had finished giving the answer in Malayalam and while it was being translated to English, She was playing with the 5 or 6 children that were sitting right in front of Her peetham (platform). She was making little sculptures with playdough and putting playdough bindis on each of the children's foreheads. She started drawing flowers with pencil crayons in an art pad. It was all really beautiful to witness. She became a total child with the children.
The questions that was posed today was:
"How can one engage in God when one works in a job that doesn't allow much focus on God? When will I be able to see God if I am unable to focus on God more often due to my job restrictions?"
Some of the highlights of Amma's (lengthy) response were:
"One who ALWAYS thinks of God becomes the devotee and one who prays to God reaches His abode." This quote was from Lord Krishna from the Bhagavat Gita.
Amma elaborated by saying: "ALL thoughts flow and become prayer so there's no difference between thought and prayer if the thoughts are pure and the intention is to reach God."
"God is not confined to just one thing or form. There is no God sitting up in the heavens on a gold throne. Go beyond ALL forms and become one with the All-Prevading Consciousness which is formless."
"Once you realize that I am not the Karta (doer) and I am not the Bhugta (receiver) then you loose the ego. God is the STRENGTH behind ALL our actions. This realization allows us to transcend the ego."
"One cannot even move a finger without the power of God behind the movement. It is by the grace and power of God that one can close his mouth after yawning. If God's power was not there, then the person's mouth would just remain open."
"We are all just instruments. Everyone is just a form of the Supreme Consciousness. All your actions should become an offering to God. When there is a strong doership (I did it) then the offering becomes a war."
Amma related a story from the Shiva Purana about a monk who performed a Fire Ceremony but took a lot of credit for it and expected to be praised for the wonderful ceremony. This became a war and the beauty of the fire ceremony was lost because the ego leared its ugly head and came in the way of the pureness of one's actions being controlled by God and therefore realizing that the beauty of this fire ceremony was not due to the monk, rather it was due to God's power behind the actions of the monk.
"It's more important to put the teachings to practise rather than always wanting to be physically close to the Master. It is that devotee that will be remembered by the Master." So many of us fight to get the closest seat to Amma or to be able to do the sevas that put us right in Her view, but in fact it's the ones that are out of sight that Amma remembers the most.
"To serve and love people you automatically have God on your "list". God doesn't carry a "list", but by serving others, you serve God and therefore remember God on a constant basis."
"We get merrits (punya) by purchasing things from Amma's shops because the money goes to all of Her charitable causes. It is better to buy things from Her shops because more than just one person benefits from that purchase. The purchaser benefits by getting the thing that he/she wants, and then so many less fortunate ones benefit from the monies raised through the sale of that item."
"Going beyond the "I" is the best way to do seva. Doing seva this way will allow us to reach God."
Amma related a story from Gautum Buddha. A monk visited a woman who did not believe in these spiritual things. The monk put his hand out to her and she spat in it. The monk responded "This is for me. Now what will you offer the world?" This illustrates that the monk had transcended his ego and was only looking to serve humanity with love. He did not get angry at the woman for spitting in his hand, rather he accepted that as an offering to him.
One really cute thing happened just before Amma concluded the Satsang with a bhajan. While the Brahmachari was still translating that last portion of Amma's response to the question, Amma was playing with the children and the playdough. She looked over Her shoulder and noticed a devotee (brahmachari/renunciate) was sitting near Her who had his eyes closed. To anyone of us, he would appear to be in meditation, but Amma knew that he was in fact sleeping and picked up her face cloth and threw it at him with perfect aim. This all happened very quickly. Amma was going to throw something else at him too, but when She turned around for the second time with the other item in Her hands, She noticed that he had awoken and was sorry that he had fallen asleep. He had his hands clasped at his heart and Amma placed the item down and motioned to him to do 10 namaskarams (standing and turning on the spot with hands clasped at heart centre offering prayers to everyone and every direction). He did this and sat back down.
It was quite humourous to watch this interaction with Amma and Her child. She did not even watch him perform these namaskarams. She continued playing with the children in front of Her.
Another story was shared when they were setting up the food lines (as Amma serves everyone lunch on Tuesdays after Satsang). There is a man with some kind of a mental illness here on the Ashram compound. He has a very large belly and his name is Raju. Once when Amma was travelling outside of India, Raju was walking around aimlessly (as he often does) on the Ashram compound and he was saying that his biological mother has no time for him and now even his Amriteshwari Amma did not have time for him either. He was contemplating taking his life as he felt that there was nothing left to live for if his Divine Mother doesn't pay attention to him. In rebellion, he went over the backwaters and went to a restaurant and ate mutton one day.
While Amma was at one of the programs in the West, She specifically asked to see the live feed computer systems which transmit live feed through Amrita TV to India. Amma looked into the camera and started waving and calling for Her Raju - Her Mutton Raju. Amma knows ALL that is happening. She does not need to be physically present in order to know what our actions are.
What a Satsang! I really loved it a lot.
Now I am needing to study my Malayalam before the Kali Puja in the Kalari at 8pm. I need to be there on time to get a good seat as I am to take pictures of the puja. This Kali Puja is for purification.
I shall write more a little later after more experiences are had.
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah
Monday, March 2, 2009
Fatigue and Perseverance
March 2, 2009
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah,
Today has been a day full of fatigue and wierdness that I am trying to persevere through. I did not get up for Archana this morning as Amma went on giving Darshan until 12 midnight last night. I was planned to go to bed at about 11:00pm as usual, but then I spoke with Jim on the phone and some of the stuff that we discussed (not related to either of us really) affected me on a level that required me to go and sit for some more time and meditate on the Divine Mother as She continued to shower Her infinite love on all.
I am glad I did this as I was able to catch another Pada Puja which was shown on the big screens to the sides of the main stage as Darshan was held in the Main Hall last night. Being Sunday, the crowds come in droves, so the Main Hall is the best venue for that many people and for the musicians to feel comfortable and for everyone to be able to bask in the energy of the Divine Mother.
I ended up going to bed at 12 midnight and then was not able to rise for Archana. My dreams were wierd and upsetting. I think this was provoked by the information discussed in my conversation with Jim earlier in the night.
It's a little cooler here today (Thank God) and I did my morning breakfast cashiering seva and then came back to the room and sat in the fan while I chatted with a few friends. The issues of the conversation last night were cleared up in one of the conversations and I am feeling a lot better about it now.
All of a sudden, it was lunch time and then I have Malayalam class...OMG...I am not ready, I have not studied at all. What am I gonna do??? I don't want to go to class and be reprimanded by the teacher. But she can see through all of it and she will instantly know that I have not done my homework. I had Sunday off from class too so there is really no excuse. I will have Tuesday off as well and so I have to study before class on Wednesday.
I ate the lunch in the Indian line today (which comes with the rent). It was quite good. Now I am quite fatigued and I just don't know why. Maybe it's the heat. Maybe is the healing work that I had done yesterday. Maybe it's being in such a highly energetically charged environment. I have no idea.
The Ashram schedule is:
Monday - no Darshan
Tuesday - Amma meditates, Q&A and serves lunch
Wednesday - Darshan
Thursday - Darshan
Friday - no Darshan (sometimes Amma might come out and give a Satsang)
Saturday - Darshan
Sunday - Darshan
Then it's anyones guess as to when Amma will come out to sing bhajans (on the non-Darshan days).
I am beginning to get this schedule around Amma here at the Ashram.
I am starting to fall asleep while I type these words so I should go and will write some more again soon. I feel the need to listen to what my body is telling me and honour it.
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah,
Today has been a day full of fatigue and wierdness that I am trying to persevere through. I did not get up for Archana this morning as Amma went on giving Darshan until 12 midnight last night. I was planned to go to bed at about 11:00pm as usual, but then I spoke with Jim on the phone and some of the stuff that we discussed (not related to either of us really) affected me on a level that required me to go and sit for some more time and meditate on the Divine Mother as She continued to shower Her infinite love on all.
I am glad I did this as I was able to catch another Pada Puja which was shown on the big screens to the sides of the main stage as Darshan was held in the Main Hall last night. Being Sunday, the crowds come in droves, so the Main Hall is the best venue for that many people and for the musicians to feel comfortable and for everyone to be able to bask in the energy of the Divine Mother.
I ended up going to bed at 12 midnight and then was not able to rise for Archana. My dreams were wierd and upsetting. I think this was provoked by the information discussed in my conversation with Jim earlier in the night.
It's a little cooler here today (Thank God) and I did my morning breakfast cashiering seva and then came back to the room and sat in the fan while I chatted with a few friends. The issues of the conversation last night were cleared up in one of the conversations and I am feeling a lot better about it now.
All of a sudden, it was lunch time and then I have Malayalam class...OMG...I am not ready, I have not studied at all. What am I gonna do??? I don't want to go to class and be reprimanded by the teacher. But she can see through all of it and she will instantly know that I have not done my homework. I had Sunday off from class too so there is really no excuse. I will have Tuesday off as well and so I have to study before class on Wednesday.
I ate the lunch in the Indian line today (which comes with the rent). It was quite good. Now I am quite fatigued and I just don't know why. Maybe it's the heat. Maybe is the healing work that I had done yesterday. Maybe it's being in such a highly energetically charged environment. I have no idea.
The Ashram schedule is:
Monday - no Darshan
Tuesday - Amma meditates, Q&A and serves lunch
Wednesday - Darshan
Thursday - Darshan
Friday - no Darshan (sometimes Amma might come out and give a Satsang)
Saturday - Darshan
Sunday - Darshan
Then it's anyones guess as to when Amma will come out to sing bhajans (on the non-Darshan days).
I am beginning to get this schedule around Amma here at the Ashram.
I am starting to fall asleep while I type these words so I should go and will write some more again soon. I feel the need to listen to what my body is telling me and honour it.
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Love and Playfulness in the Sweetest Form
March 1, 2009
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah,
What a day this has turned out to be. I was never expecting to travel across the backwaters to have a semi-private tour of the Ayurvedic College and Hospital followed by a special Darshan with Lakshmi (the female elephant) AND Ram (the male elephant).
I had the great good fortune to feed Lakshmi some bananas and she danced and danced in joy and then I was allowed to climb up on her back and there are pictures to prove it. The skin of an elephant is quite course, sort of similar to dry human skin. What a trip that was to spend time with these gorgeous animals who are treated like Gods and blessed by Amma.
Ram is a little more fierce so we were only able to feed him and take a few pictures quickly with him. Somehow, they really resemble (energetically) that of the male and female human. Males are more sun energy (projective) and females are more moon energy (reflective). This was certainly the case with Ram and Lakshmi! Ram was very sweet and devoted in his own right. He would respond with a loud noise when we wished him an "Aum Namah Shivaya Ram"
God, I am so blessed. I don't know anywhere else in the world that I would be able to have these kinds of experiences. It is so hot here that when just a simple breeze comes through it's like a blessing from God. The things we usually take for granted are becoming more and more clear to me here in Amritapuri and it's allowing me to have more appreciation for the "small" things in life - like a fresh breeze of air to freshen us up in the sweaty, scorching heat of South India.
I have been invited to come to the Kali Puja (for purification) on Tuesday from 8:00 - 9:30pm and take pictures of that puja. All pujas and homas are held in the Kalari and for the most part picture taking is frowned upon here at the Ashram, but you can get a few in here and there (if you are discrete about it). In this case, I have been invited by Gireesh, the Head Priest (Pujari) and he is allowing me to take pictures of the entire puja and the inside of the Kalari. I wish that I had a camcorder with me as that would be a great thing to capture. Pratechas was able to capture a few minutes of the Shivaratri Puja and bhajans on his camcorder (which I now have on my computer as I burned copies for Gireesh). When I watch these little clips, they are just so powerful. The energy of those ceremonies is so tangible in these short clips that I wish I could capture the same with the Kali Puja. No doubt it's gonna be a really powerful one too!
Amma is still going strong right now as I sit here in my room with the small plug-in fan on me and type my blog. It's 7pm here on Sunday night. She started giving Darshan (as per my previous post, at 11am). There is speculation that She will go on until about midnight or so tonight.
I am feeling a bit hungry and thinking that it might be time to consider going down to the Canteen for some dinner. I have spent a lot of time out in the sun today which is quite draining so regular food and hydration is a very important aspect of being in India.
I leave you with thoughts of dancing elephants, chanting Aum Namah Shivaya (in their own words) and making offerings to these glorious beings on this earth.
Aum Lokah Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu
Aum Lokah Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu
Aum Lokah Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu
(May All the Being in All the worlds be happy and at peace)
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah!
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah,
What a day this has turned out to be. I was never expecting to travel across the backwaters to have a semi-private tour of the Ayurvedic College and Hospital followed by a special Darshan with Lakshmi (the female elephant) AND Ram (the male elephant).
I had the great good fortune to feed Lakshmi some bananas and she danced and danced in joy and then I was allowed to climb up on her back and there are pictures to prove it. The skin of an elephant is quite course, sort of similar to dry human skin. What a trip that was to spend time with these gorgeous animals who are treated like Gods and blessed by Amma.
Ram is a little more fierce so we were only able to feed him and take a few pictures quickly with him. Somehow, they really resemble (energetically) that of the male and female human. Males are more sun energy (projective) and females are more moon energy (reflective). This was certainly the case with Ram and Lakshmi! Ram was very sweet and devoted in his own right. He would respond with a loud noise when we wished him an "Aum Namah Shivaya Ram"
God, I am so blessed. I don't know anywhere else in the world that I would be able to have these kinds of experiences. It is so hot here that when just a simple breeze comes through it's like a blessing from God. The things we usually take for granted are becoming more and more clear to me here in Amritapuri and it's allowing me to have more appreciation for the "small" things in life - like a fresh breeze of air to freshen us up in the sweaty, scorching heat of South India.
I have been invited to come to the Kali Puja (for purification) on Tuesday from 8:00 - 9:30pm and take pictures of that puja. All pujas and homas are held in the Kalari and for the most part picture taking is frowned upon here at the Ashram, but you can get a few in here and there (if you are discrete about it). In this case, I have been invited by Gireesh, the Head Priest (Pujari) and he is allowing me to take pictures of the entire puja and the inside of the Kalari. I wish that I had a camcorder with me as that would be a great thing to capture. Pratechas was able to capture a few minutes of the Shivaratri Puja and bhajans on his camcorder (which I now have on my computer as I burned copies for Gireesh). When I watch these little clips, they are just so powerful. The energy of those ceremonies is so tangible in these short clips that I wish I could capture the same with the Kali Puja. No doubt it's gonna be a really powerful one too!
Amma is still going strong right now as I sit here in my room with the small plug-in fan on me and type my blog. It's 7pm here on Sunday night. She started giving Darshan (as per my previous post, at 11am). There is speculation that She will go on until about midnight or so tonight.
I am feeling a bit hungry and thinking that it might be time to consider going down to the Canteen for some dinner. I have spent a lot of time out in the sun today which is quite draining so regular food and hydration is a very important aspect of being in India.
I leave you with thoughts of dancing elephants, chanting Aum Namah Shivaya (in their own words) and making offerings to these glorious beings on this earth.
Aum Lokah Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu
Aum Lokah Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu
Aum Lokah Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu
(May All the Being in All the worlds be happy and at peace)
Aum Amriteshwaryai Namah!
Healing the Physical, Emotional and Spiritual Bodies
March 1, 2009
Aum Amritshwaryai Namah,
As usual, my intention was to arise in time for Archana and then do my breakfast cashiering seva in the Western Canteen. Unfortunatly, the former is not happening for me as yet. I don't know what it is, but I seem to be very tired here in the early mornings. Maybe it's the heat?!?! I am putting out into the Universe and to Amma, my sincere desire to arise at 4am each morning for Archana (especially since it's something I was told I must do in my vedic astrology reading yesterday).
This morning I had a wonderful "hands-off" healing for 1 hour from a wonderful and (really attractive) Austrian named Stefan (we have grown to be good friends in my time here thusfar). He asked Amma if he could get Her blessings in offering these healing sessions to people and She agreed and so they set up a room and a sign-up sheet for him in the Kali Temple.
This was one of the most powerful energy healing sessions that I think I have ever had. He did not touch my body once, but the few things that were ailing me seem to have diminished considerably.
Following my healing session, I went down to the Main Hall where Amma had started giving Darshan just as my healing session began. I could hear the Guru Stotram being recited (which they do during the Pada Puja at the beginning of Darshan programs here) just as I laid down for my healing. When I got to the Main Hall, they were between bhajans and the hall is quite full as today is Sunday and many Indians have come to receive Darshan. Once the musicians started singing, I realized that the bhajan that they were singing was actually a shabad (hymn) out of the Siri Guru Granth Sahib (Sikh Scriptures) - Hey Govind, Hey Gopal, Hey Dayal Laal.
This was such a deep and profound experience for me as I have not heard any of the Sikh Scriptures (which are all shabads/bhajans/hymns) being sung in the context of Amma programs or Satsangs. It really spoke to me deeply as I am a Sikh by birth and feel very connected to Sikh Dharma while being completely and utterly devoted to my Amma Guru Maharani.
This was just so very healing for me to hear a Sikh Shabad being sung to Amma while She offers Darshan to the masses.
I shall write more soon. I want to go to Swamini Amma to find out if she as any emeralds as that is what I was told to wear by the vedic astrologer.
Aum Amriteshewaryai Namah
Aum Amritshwaryai Namah,
As usual, my intention was to arise in time for Archana and then do my breakfast cashiering seva in the Western Canteen. Unfortunatly, the former is not happening for me as yet. I don't know what it is, but I seem to be very tired here in the early mornings. Maybe it's the heat?!?! I am putting out into the Universe and to Amma, my sincere desire to arise at 4am each morning for Archana (especially since it's something I was told I must do in my vedic astrology reading yesterday).
This morning I had a wonderful "hands-off" healing for 1 hour from a wonderful and (really attractive) Austrian named Stefan (we have grown to be good friends in my time here thusfar). He asked Amma if he could get Her blessings in offering these healing sessions to people and She agreed and so they set up a room and a sign-up sheet for him in the Kali Temple.
This was one of the most powerful energy healing sessions that I think I have ever had. He did not touch my body once, but the few things that were ailing me seem to have diminished considerably.
Following my healing session, I went down to the Main Hall where Amma had started giving Darshan just as my healing session began. I could hear the Guru Stotram being recited (which they do during the Pada Puja at the beginning of Darshan programs here) just as I laid down for my healing. When I got to the Main Hall, they were between bhajans and the hall is quite full as today is Sunday and many Indians have come to receive Darshan. Once the musicians started singing, I realized that the bhajan that they were singing was actually a shabad (hymn) out of the Siri Guru Granth Sahib (Sikh Scriptures) - Hey Govind, Hey Gopal, Hey Dayal Laal.
This was such a deep and profound experience for me as I have not heard any of the Sikh Scriptures (which are all shabads/bhajans/hymns) being sung in the context of Amma programs or Satsangs. It really spoke to me deeply as I am a Sikh by birth and feel very connected to Sikh Dharma while being completely and utterly devoted to my Amma Guru Maharani.
This was just so very healing for me to hear a Sikh Shabad being sung to Amma while She offers Darshan to the masses.
I shall write more soon. I want to go to Swamini Amma to find out if she as any emeralds as that is what I was told to wear by the vedic astrologer.
Aum Amriteshewaryai Namah
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